When I am gone, as all must eventually go; all that will remain of me are the people who I had an impact on while I was here; that and the few sentimental trinkets and countless collected volumes containing the poorly penned and fiercely guarded thoughts of what will surely be credited by future anthropologists as recovered works authored by a very wordy, often irritable, long dead intensely suspicious hermit.

     It is my hope that those impacts that will remain will be moved to tell a legacy of compassion and a willingness to do what must be done when it must be done I am to be onafraid to say what must be said even when it isn't easy.

    As to the trinkets and the mountains of difficult to read journals; I can only hope that it is not a vital matter of importance for future research that may be summed up and quantified in only five sentences or less. To do so, and to be dutiful about one's work, one would either have to skip over a significant amount of content or to have a very powerful yet very broad command of linguistics and bureaucratic functioning.

     Who I am today may result in creating a person that I become who is foreign on every level to the young man I've come to replace. Who we are as individuals as a continuouslyrewritten narrative with plot devices that can thrill, bore, frustrate, and sometimes completely surprised with its merciful humor and compelling character arc.

    Difficult as the task would be for most,  at the very least someone writing several hundred years after I have no longer been reported and sightings on this planet would have the fortunate benefit of being able to prepare a report with the knowledge that it's unlikely new information will be presented that forces a rewrite or causes one to have to continually subscribe to updates. 

    With individuals who are long dead and widely considered to be reasonably  well documented; a comprehensive, if not subjective, character study may be provided. What about those humans who aren't as well documented; or those still drafting new chapters in their living story? 

    Defining any living person is like seeking a complete summary of a complex work despite the fact that the work is still very much in progress and the planning committee having been grossly underfunded. To one skilled in the art of bullshit, a report may be possible; but not one which truly acquaints the reader with the authentic nature, context, or significance of the subject matter.

    I have heard presented the argument that such matters as described above are those which provide a utilitarian value to the social archetypes and their first cousins twice removed, the stereotype. Although I understand the appeal of this idea, I can't say that I entirely agree with the position. 

   The argument states that humanity is far too diverse and much too open to interpretation to be easily Categorized without creating Nero and recognizable sub categories into which we then seek to assign them. This to me screams of either lazy riding or perhaps the biased notions owned by someone who interacted with either very few people or at a rather shallow depth.

    Many humans are visually oriented creatures and often these people might have heard at some point the old expression that goes a picture is worth 1000 words. Watch left outside of the frame however every meaningful story which encapsulates its context. 

    To those who have never known what it is to visually experience a photograph; their entire interaction with history has largely been in the structure of words rather than visual interpretation. For the visually impaired detail is found in dynamic ways through the provision of information which is conveyed by interpreting metrics such as identity of the speaker, there diction, and inferences drawn from what might be heard in the speakers tone.

         For a great number of others, such as those with attention deficit disorder or sensory processing conditions; too many words can create barriers to connecting with what is being communicated. What can be intended to illustrate may instead cause a clear picture to lose focus.

     Granting that determining what is considered too little or too much in terms of descriptive language is entirely subjective and can only be determined individually, those who experience a struggle with discerning the meaning behind a wall of words may very well enjoy visual representations of complex concepts. 

    For some, simply showing speaks volumes more than explaining. Some among these have been close friends of mine. of these I have often heard that the apology offered that they have good intentions in the start of a conversation but are eventually battered into submission by my incessant yammering and its high precision assaults on their attention span.

    For others, myself included, there are no rigid limitations on the amount of words which could be used to describe any topic, provided that the words are understood and are not accompanied by micro aggression, condescension, or an excess of time consuming redundancy. 

    Words contain so many interpretive variations when considering their source and deployment that a speakers nuanced selection of which words are best  suited for a particular task that I tend to be highly appreciative of detail and subject depth as each uttered syllable enhances or degrades my confidence that I am properly contextualizing what someone is saying to me.

    It could be fair to say that I have a complex relationship with information. In regards to providing information, I can be a considered to be some thing again to a open book; if allowing of course the additional context of this book being an esoteric encyclopedia and the library being a private one for which access is somewhat  conditionally restrictive.      

   The response often comes down to the notion of who is requesting the access, the nature of the information request, and the expectation of of the requester of the information's personalization for their preference. 

    To offer clarification of the above, what I meant to say is this; unless I know a person quite well it's difficult to determine what they will be satisfied with when they ask me about  a topic, and admitting a lingering dread of disappointing people, I tend to approach any request for information in the same manner a barista might go about pouring cream into a new customers expensive coffee. 

    Rather than insulting or underwhelming with a to meager trip I attempt to convey confidence in the listeners sense of personal boundaries by a continuing to pour until either my socks begin to soak or the requester finally says, "When," "Thank you; that's precisely what I needed to know," or everyone's favorite holiday hit, "OK, ok, please, for the love of God – that was a rhetorical question."

   Perhaps in this regard I can agree with the sentiment that a picture can say 1000 words; at least as far as it expresses that either a photograph or 1000 words could be equally inadequate if the task at hand is to fully describe the life of an average person. 

    A photograph might capture an important moment, and 1000 words mate bring you into a season; but I have rarely met a person for whom either measure would properly and without question tell you everything there is to know about them. Think of how many photographs I've been taken of you and how many words passed through your mind yesterday, or in the week before.

   The only time such brief summarizations seem appropriate to me are on gravemarkers which relate to an entity which an interested party could, else-wise and on their own time choose to inquire. 

    While I greatly appreciate the descriptive versatility of individual words, far too frequently I find that the stigma attached to certain others does more to conceal or limit a true understanding then it tends to expand or enumerate.

    Unless you've experienced personally the negative potential in summary descriptors it might be difficult to relate to my distaste for providing minimal efforts when it comes to the language used to describe real people. It might be sufficient for a person who centers the whole of their identity around one or two aspects of themselves to summarize that they are in the space one can legibly make use of on the back of a postcard. 

    Perhaps it is some thing of a personal bias to explore; but when I hear people describing other people, my love of linguistics does not overshadow my distrust in the notion of any adjective being capable of unilaterally accomplishing a name of such scope with an acceptable and authoritative degree of reliability. 

    Many words carry many meanings and weights, and what someone says to us and what we interpret are open to misunderstanding on top of being vulnerable to misuse bye a malicious communicators intention to malign, misrepresent, or manipulate the understanding conveyed to their intended recipient.

    While I consider myself an optimist more so than a misanthrope, without context for the events which formed me, a reasonable person can be blamed for being unable to determine that from passive inferences gleamed through the high degree of caution I display when faced with individuals asking me to take departure from holding them accountable for their words or filtering that information through a Files system of references built on personal observations, anecdotal evidence, and the controversial gift of critical thinking.

    When provided information which is not an accounting of events but rather an appeal to reach a conclusion; I find myself questioning the intentions of the speaker and the motivation to enlist me into forming face value assumptions about instances and individuals wildly outside my sphere of interest. 

    I feel the same way about how many people go about wielding certain words, and their rather pointed subtexts, as wartime stratagems for a conflict I would typically conscientiously object to participating in. I make note of such efforts and listen with polite respect and make external effort to keep to myself my internal skepticism. 

    Targeted descriptive language summons some internal guardian within me to their post at the gate of incredulity, as this feels like an inducement to discriminate rather than a reverent sacrifice made on the altar of information; an offense akin to sacrilege, considering that my most consistent defining traits and perhaps principal deity is the ironically ineffable construct most commonly known as Curiousity.

    Again, anecdotally,; much of my apprehension comes from having at one time or another been inconvenienced, excluded, misrepresented, or wrongfully discriminated against as a result of the human tendency to seek understanding through coded representation and oversimplification.

    If I were to bake you a pie using effort, care, and a secret recipe passed down for generations, it would feel to me reductive if I were in your presence and heard it described as having consumed flour, or filling. Similarly so is the crux of my conflict with overgeneralization and pejorative labeling.

      From individual personal biases to far reaching international policies impacting every community sharing this planet; divisive and dangerous ideas are often needlessly injected into the limited spaces in which it is possible to seek meaningful engagement with policymakers, educators, community leaders and every other facet of our collective human existence. 

    Especially now; with a world of slippery slopes, economic inequality, and ever widening gaps in vital areas which are only exacerbated by making wholistic assumptions about who we are, what we face, and what checking politically charged little boxes tells a stranger you've never met to expect from you; it's time to admit either that we have advanced beyond forms which have always been handed to us; or that we still fail to understand how much such has been lost through the sheer laziness and manipulative benefits which continue to promote the idea that everyone can be categorized so easily that you can assume that you know anything at all about a person that you've never met simply because you've heard of humans with whom they have at least one or two features in common.

    To be, to feel, to be present and yet for your presence to count for nothing; this is far more cruel and much more painful than simply not to have ever existed. To care and to dream and to know how you wish to live and what you would wish to devote that life to becomes meaningless when external small minded bullshit that has nothing to do with who you truly can make self determination and the power to choose your own destiny into little more than politically beneficial soundbites and promising future's which are never delivered.

     Our species survived and thrived on this planet largely and thanks to our innate power of pattern recognition, but the same instinctive capability to quickly assess and classify has also been one of the greatest factors which has time and time again erased gains which were never contemplated and negated potential for new and enriching human advancement that could one day be the reason why a single global catastrophe wipes our entire species from the universe as if it never existed at all. We inhabit, for what we know with certainty, only one tiny cosmic spec in the entirety of the known universe and we've spent millennia on fighting over limited resources and a universe of infinite possibilities. 

    We've gained so much technological capability despite having never embraced the unity of a common goal and still find that no matter who you are, what you believe, what you've experienced, what you were granted at birth or what you've been deprived your entire life - there is nothing natural or fulfilling about an existence which is wasted allowing others to define what you are by filling in little boxes that relate to less information than that which you have probably at one time written on your own palm. 

    The notion of participating in life while living for nothing then the sake that you were born and after, not even having the power to decide for yourself what you're capable of achieving from the moment of your birth until you to fill a little box at the end with nothing more than a handful of words to defined you for all of time chiseled in a stone grave marker that makes no mention of any of the features that were used to define to the world who you are, where you were from, how high you could climb, or the value and legitimacy of your input.

    To spend an entire life being systematically excluded from endeavors you would have excelled in or program medically trained to assume the worst of someone who in another reality could've been the best friend you'll never have is the result of cultural engineering dating back far longer than any living person today bares the responsibility for. 

    Whether or not you have ever seen a photograph, it should take fewer than one thousand words to know that you deserve more than this, or to decide for yourself if you can be better than this. Today, the responsibility that we each bear is to determine for ourselves whether we wish to continue to define ourselves by the half truths, whole lies, and the uncorrected ignorance which is eventually echoed by every fallen empire; or, whether we take this and possibly rare and incomprehensibly precious opportunity granted to us to be a person that has never existed before anywhere in time and through doing so break the cycle which was imposed upon you by the limitations of our predecessors, and discover what impact you could have which could never exist without first learning to celebrate the unique and to unlearning any comparisons which presume the ability or disability of another person based on bodies or what a lifetime worth of trauma, and validation, broken trust, and systems of discriminatory control have built to limit, boxing, and ultimately imprison the mind.

   Perhaps it may not have been from our strength as individuals now that the scrapings and clawing's brother and sisters brought us here, and no matter how we feel about our circumstances it is not from our metal but this system has been caste, but we must decide, each of us and for ourselves, whether we wish to continue playing Monopoly as pawn and games we don't understand and that are never one by anyone aside from shadow oligarchs, martyrs, and world changing innovators.

    If life were meant to be nothing more than limited choices, distractions, and the same old games then life would be an arcade and what is an arcade if you don't have the access to it to even enjoy the delusion of that distraction? Personally I am very much tired of playing games when even the people who have cheated since they wrote the rules are growing bored with it. I know for myself that simply having been myself has been a continual struggle against pitfalls which have a waited for generations and with the assholes that I'd likely not even waste the words which one could convey with a photograph. Regardless this life, difficult so it may be at times, as the only one that I have; I won't let what others wish to label me as decide what I am. Neither should you. Especially if you are lucky enough to be born possessing capabilities that I don't have, I hope that you were able to do some thing with that gift wish I have personally never imagined.

    I hope that every person reading this can feel as though they are an authentic and individually unique light which exists in this universe and aren't simply pretending that they are nothing more than modern extensions of a brutal system designed by individuals that who may have been clever for their time but would possess by modern standards less empirical information than that available to the average middle school student and died having never learned that one day history would become a  collectively owned property, it would become possible in the future to populate distant star systems and explore galaxies they lacked the means to observe or even that owning people is kind of a dick move. No matter white culture even heritage, or white body that you have been born with, or white I struggle it might be to take back your ownership of your self, the decision begins with you first deciding for yourself whether or not you believe that any human in any role anywhere which humans may be found had the right to tell you right now that you are incapable of being more than you were before you became who you are. After that the only thing that is left is to discover who you will be.